Worst Lyrics to a Good Song

Bad lyrics and bad songs go together, as do good lyrics and good songs. Most songs have a good line or two, or a bad line or two, and the rest of the words are neither here nor there. I don’t mind. I like my mindlessness intentional. If you are attempting profundity you have to be profound. Don’t tell me that “the future’s open wide.” I had guessed.

Thinking about it, good songs with bad lyrics are pretty rare. Here is one. Great tune, great sound in its way, killer drum break, even the singing is good. But the words are one embarrassment after another, and enunciated proudly so you can’t avoid them. Right from the title: I’ll melt with you? Gosh. Easy, kid. Then into “there’s nothing you and I won’t do.” Really, nothing? I tell you flat out, pal, there are going to be problems.

And I especially like “making love with you was never second-best.” Just so she (and we) know he’s got a scorecard.

They never followed it up. I saw them open for Roxy Music in 1982 and they were terrible, but the words were unintelligible. The food was bad but at least the portions were small.

Any others come to mind?



4 thoughts on “Worst Lyrics to a Good Song

  1. Perhaps it’s because most of the music I listen to is intellectually inferior to what the rest of you guys listen to, but I find myself thinking, “good song, bad lyrics” a lot and, for the most part, I don’t give a hoot.

    I could produce many of these, but here’s the one that jumps into my head immediately. Plant seriously could not have written this nonsense down beforehand. I’m guessing he was just improvising and they recorded it, then they officially wrote it down and filled in the cracks later. Right?

    My favorite is, “I ain’t jokin’ woman.” Really. He ain’t jokin’.

    You’ve heard the classic a million times, so I give you the karaoke version, so you can fully concentrate on the inane, repetitive lyrics. We get the point after about two sentences, maybe one.


  2. Anything by Journey, a band of excellent musicians who could not afford a lyricist. “Born and raised in South Detroit?” There is no South Detroit. Maybe they meant Toronto? How about “Lights?” Barf city.

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